Book Review: The Everything Wedding Etiquette Book by Holly Lefevre

I want to introduce you to one of my new bloggy friends, her name is Holly Lefevre.  I met this fabulous woman through two of her blogs, Hip Weddings, and 504 Main.  I fell in love with her posts, they were always full of such great ideas and information.  After reading her blogs for a while, I learned that she is the author of a great book called The Everything Wedding Etiquette Book.  I am a HUGE fan of etiquette (my other favorite bloggy friends is Etiquette with Miss Janice), so I was immediately intrigued!

Holly was nice enough to send me her book.  I read it cover to cover in one night, it is a very easy read, and FULL of great information.  Etiquette is something that people do not spend enough time on these days, so Holly is making it VERY easy for you to stay in line.  She was even gracious enough to answer a few questions for me.  So, without further ado...

Why did you decide to write an etiquette book?

It actually found me. I was working on another wedding project, when this opportunity came along. The other project was not moving along as quickly as I liked so I jumped at the chance to write something for the Everything series. There is a lot of wedding information out there, but I truly enjoy being able to provide advice that is real and honest - weddings are amazing but not always fun and "hearts and flowers" - there is real emotion and problems involved too. I had also been a speaker at bridal shows for years, covering planning design, and etiquette, so this was a natural progression.

How long did it take you to write the book?

If I recall the whole process was only about 3-4 months. Since this book is part of the Everything Series, there had been previous editions. I was not starting from scratch, but rather updating and rearranging a previous edition, which in some ways is a lot easier than starting from scratch, and other ways not. While I had the basic premise and a lot of viable information already, it was up to me to update the book with new etiquette questions and standards, to make the book my own, and to make it fit withe the series of books.

 

What is your favorite section of the book?

Tough one - they are all my favorites in different ways and for different reasons. I think I like The Business of Being A Bride. So many brides do not realize what it takes to pull a wedding - as they envisions weddings to be - off. I strive to be realistic in my advice and answers. I want them to understand this is a business for the vendors and for them, for two reasons...I do not believe in negotiating anyone to death or manipulating anyone into a price or service they cannot afford...this is both for the vendors and the brides. I want brides to realize help is out there in the form of a wedding planner or by involving your groom or family members. As much as I wish everyone would hire a wedding planner, I know this is not going to happen, so I really want to educate brides.

Which etiquette standard is ignored the most by brides, or grooms?

The one etiquette standard I see brides wanting to wiggle on all the time is not having the guests pay for anything. Too many times, to save money they want to have a cash bar or have the guests pay for their own valet parking. No, no, no! If you cannot afford it do not do it. Plan a wedding within your means.

I once worked with a couple who married at a major luxury hotel. They thought food was of the utmost importance (which it is to a degree). They had 10 different hor d'oeuvres and paid over $10,000 for their cocktail hour and then refused to pick up the valet parking (the only parking available without having to walk a number of blocks) bill of $10.00 per car. The hotel was even advising against this amount of hors d'oeuvres and they refused to listen. As a planner you can only do so much. Couples should also learn to trust the experts they hire and are working with.

Overall I say being gracious goes a long way. I was fortunate to work with mainly wonderful, kind brides, but I have also worked with my share of diva brides. The guests are paying the bride and groom an honor by coming to the wedding, as the bride/groom is honoring them with the invitation. This extends from beginning the ceremony on time and not making the guests wait for an unreasonable amount of time to planning your timeline so that guests are not left waiting for 2 hours for dinner to begin after the ceremony to playing appropriate music at the appropriate times of the reception.

 

Some of my Favorite Holly posts:
~ A Gracious Bride Knows
~ What's A Mother To Do?
~ True or False...The Mom's Must Match?

THANK YOU Holly for writing this book. I hope future brides realize how important it is, and read it! If you are interested in buying Holly's book, check out Amazon.
 
*hugs*
Denice
 
Photo Credit: http://hipweddings.blogspot.com/